I had spent weeks praying for guidance. A decision loomed and I wasn’t sure what to do. There were arguments for both sides of the decision, both of which seemed compelling. So I prayed that God would speak to me and tell me what to do.

I grew up reading stories from the Bible about how God intervened in history and spoke to his people through various means. The stories of old weren’t just cute fables, but pictures of a God who chooses to communicate to his creation, and still speaks to people today. I knew that God spoke. I just wanted him to speak in a particular way. 

I wanted a burning bush moment. A road to Damascus encounter. A talking donkey experience. Dew on fleece. A dream (that’s easy to interpret, of course). I would even take a rebuke from a disgruntled prophet of the Lord.

God does speak today. We have the Bible, which is how God has chosen to primarily communicate to us. We also have the Holy Spirit of God within us, bringing to mind God’s word and exalting Jesus. But what do we do with decisions that don’t seem to have a go-to chapter and verse?

ASK GOD FOR WISDOM

It was in the midst of this season that I taught a class at my church through the New Testament letter of James. I ran into the following verse:

“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.” (James 1:5)

As James writes to Jewish Christians who are scattered all across the diaspora, one of his first encouragements is to ask God for wisdom. Wisdom to know how to endure suffering and trials. Wisdom to live as religious and ethnic minorities. Wisdom to navigate the complexities of everyday life as a Christian.

We might view wisdom as human philosophy or “words to live by,” but wisdom from God is living in step with how he has patterned the world. It’s putting to practice what we know from God’s word. It’s living in step with the Spirit.

While we may want a Magic 8 Ball with God’s answers, he offers us so much more. He offers us wisdom. Not pithy phrases or Yoda-isms, but the ability to see how God sees the world and to apply what he has revealed in Scripture.  

What struck me about the passage from James 1 was the openness of the invitation. Do you lack wisdom? Ask God!. He will give generously and without reproach. God, who loves to give good gifts, would love to give you wisdom.

INVITE GODLY COUNSEL 

We don’t make decisions alone. By God’s great wisdom, he created us to live with others. One of the many benefits of Christian community is the accumulated wisdom that comes from other believers who are filled with the Holy Spirit. The kingdom of God is a community that spans generations, cultures, and ideologies. Therefore, seeking wisdom from other believers can help protect us from the echo chambers we live in and ensure that we’re not walking in darkness. 

MAKE A DECISION BY FAITH

This can seem daunting — what if I make the wrong decision? I’m often crippled with fear that my life will be derailed by one of my decisions. I may choose the wrong job opportunity or have the wrong approach to disciplining my children. Whenever we are paralyzed by fear, it is likely because we doubt the providence of God who is sovereign and whose plans can’t be thwarted – even if you chose the “wrong” job. 

God calls us to walk in freedom, knowing that the Holy Spirit lives within us and equips us for every good work. This doesn’t mean we should make hasty decisions or that our decisions are inconsequential. However, it simply means that we don’t need to live in fear. As long as the decision and our motivations aren’t sinful, we can make a decision that applies what we know from God’s word.

BE CONFORMED INTO THE IMAGE OF JESUS

Jesus is the ultimate wisdom of God (1 Corinthians 1:24, 30). His teachings point to how we are to live in God’s kingdom and his life depicts the wisdom of God that confounds the wisdom of the world. This realization has transformed the last decade of my life and ministry. I’m no longer stuck in “analysis paralysis” — overthinking everything so that I’m unable to make a decision. I’ve enjoyed the gift of God in his word, his Spirit, and wise counsel. I wish I could say my decisions have only been wise these last ten years. They haven’t. But through his Spirit, his word, and his people, God is conforming me more into the image of Jesus. Even in my decision making.

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Brice lives in Oklahoma with his wife, Robyn, and two kids: Ellery and Emmaus. Despite his location, he is an avid Texas Longhorn and enjoys sports, reading, and spending time with his family.

I couldn’t wait to preach. The passage had done its work in me, challenged my mind, burrowed into my heart, and awakened me to joy and repentance. It was now time to invite others to share my experience. I wanted nothing more than to faithfully paint a vision of God to enthrall and lead them to deeper trust in God. 

Our service wouldn’t start for another three hours, so I listened to worship music to further prepare my heart. How Great Is Our God began to play. I imagined the day people from every tribe, tongue, and nation would unite their hearts and burst into song about the glory of Jesus. Tears filled my eyes as I prayed for the church to taste even a morsel of that future feast. 

The time had come. I stood before the church filled with expectation, poured out my heart, and more importantly, what I believed was God’s heart for the congregation. But when the sermon was done, the announcements were made, and the benediction given, a depressing realization settled in. It’s the kind of realization that makes you question the meaning of preaching, and you sense the absurdity of our work.

After all the toil, labor, and longing for God and the church, what did they do?

They went to lunch. 

Are We Crazy?

Let’s admit it. Our ministry appears absurd at times. If we proclaim the gospel every week, we proclaim a message designed to confound the wisdom of this world. It’s foolishness to those who are perishing, but the power of God to those being saved. Therefore, no matter how winsome our approach, we must brace ourselves to appear foolish, knowing that the substance of our sermons is a stumbling block to many.

Our conviction makes us look crazy, too. At a hearing before King Agrippa, someone wondered if Paul’s education had made him go mad. Paul, a prisoner awaiting trial, responded by looking into the eyes of a king with wealth, power, and prestige, and expressed his yearning for the king to be more like him.  

Indeed, the content of and our conviction in the gospel makes us appear crazy. But we’ve prepared for this. We knew what we were getting into by becoming messengers of the gospel—and we’re not ashamed of it. But there’s still another sense in which preaching feels absurd, which goes beyond content and conviction, and is exposed by lunch and an afternoon nap. 

The Prophet Who Pastors

We have about thirty minutes of the church’s attention every week, and we don’t want to squander it. It’s an opportunity to disrupt the false gospels that discipled them throughout the week and stir their affection for the Lord. Therefore, we feel the weight of what we preach, that the words are laced with eternal significance and should also be weighed by our church. This is the prophetic nature of our call. 

We also know we’re called to help people locate God in the ordinary details of their days. We remind them of the sacredness of life, that God determined our times and places so we could find him wherever we are, and that he’s not far from any of us, not even during lunch. This is the pastoral nature of our call.

Absurdity arises when we focus on one aspect of our call. The prophet in us wants the sermon to cut to the heart, for heaven and hell are at stake, and joy and abundant life are available to those who hear. But when wholehearted preaching is received with a halfhearted response, we wonder, have I cared too much? Am I absurd for feeling so deeply, for believing this in my bones? Or worse, have my desires for this church exceeded God’s? Why didn’t he lead them to respond?

To avoid this, we must learn to make prophetic calls with pastoral sensibilities. We eagerly expect God to transform people. Why else would we preach? But we temper expectations to acknowledge God’s activity after the benediction.  

Resurrection Power and a Meal

It’s hard to do this consistently, but Jesus instructs us here. As history looked forward to the promise of redemption, Jesus came near to us, obeyed the Father, succeeded in every place we failed, fulfilled the law and the prophets, endured the cross, despised its shame, and rose victoriously from the dead. Yet after vanquishing sin and death, he did something that was as mundane as his resurrection was astonishing.

He made breakfast for his friends. 

This encapsulates the wonder I’m slow to receive—that God’s cosmic purposes are not slowed by a table with friends. An ordinary meal can be an occasion to behold and ponder resurrection power—even breakfast can find a place in God’s plan. 

This doesn’t diminish the need for joy and expectation when we preach. We’re called to study the text, pour out our hearts, and pray for the church so that together, we can behold his glory. The heavens cannot contain it. Neither can our sermons. But who knows what God will reveal over lunch?

This post was originally published on the Acts 29 blog.

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Jason James oversees The Advance Initiative’s content and cohort. He coaches planters and pastors as a certified coach with City to City and Church Multiplication Ministries. He is also the pastor of New Hope Church in Harlem, NY.

In the video below, Marilyn Thomas shares stories and experiences that will stir your heart for the largest unreached people groups in the world. This was taken from the 2022 Advance Initiative Conference in Dallas, TX.

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I made many regrettable decisions during my early twenties. I cringe at the words spoken and actions taken that led to painful consequences. As a young woman, I didn’t know how to grapple with conflicting emotions or confront challenging situations. I needed someone who could offer practical advice on friendships, finances, relationships, and spiritual growth – an older godly woman (a well-seasoned woman) who could guide me with the wisdom she gained in her own walk with God. 

As I entered my thirties and forties, I realized that it was time for me to take on the role that I had been seeking.  I had to ask myself why I hadn’t mentored other women. What obstacles and reservations prevented me from extending the same support and guidance to them?  

 Here are five common lies that stop women from mentoring other women. 

“Discipleship is a one-way street.”

Although discipleship requires us to invest in others, it doesn’t mean we don’t receive anything in return. We can have a reciprocal relationship where both parties learn and grow together. While we may offer knowledge, insight, and experience, we can be stirred by the youth, passion, and even questions of those we disciple. 

“Discipleship requires extensive biblical knowledge.”

It is important to know the Bible, but we don’t have to have formal theological training. People that we disciple can still gain wisdom in seeing us live out the bible in our lives. They can see the “word made flesh” through us in the way we model the character and teachings of Jesus. And in the event we fail, we can even model humility, repentance, and dependence upon the grace of Jesus.

“Discipleship is only for pastors or church leaders.”

Every believer participates in making disciples. If we are new believers, we tell those who are far from him about our newfound faith. If we are married, we model what it looks like to have a godly marriage. If we are single, we model what it means to honor God in our singleness. If we have lost loved ones, we model what it looks like to grieve well. In other words, there may be unique experiences that God has given us for the edification and benefit of other women and their spiritual growth.

“Discipleship is solely about spiritual matters.”

Many people think about their spiritual lives as their quiet devotional life. However, discipleship requires the whole person to grow in the likeness of Christ. This requires us to address the emotional, relational, and practical aspects of life as well. It seeks to bring the transforming power of the Gospel into every area of life.

“I have nothing valuable to offer.”

Some women underestimate their own wisdom, skills, and experiences, downplaying their potential to positively impact others. They assume they have to be married or have children to offer practical wisdom to another woman. But God has given us all a variety of gifts and experiences. “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” (1 Peter 4:10). Our gifts, abilities, and experiences are not meant to be hidden or dismissed but deployed in service to others. 

Answering the Call

Jesus commands every one of his followers to go and make disciples (Matthew 28:20). Therefore, as women, we, too, must ask how we have responded to this command. Who is growing in the likeness of Christ because of our intentional investment in their lives?

We don’t need to despair if we discover that we have neglected this calling. We can pray and seek God's guidance to know whom we should disciple. We can start to cultivate a genuine relationship with her by listening to her concerns and sharing our experiences. We can guide her in developing spiritual disciplines such as prayer, worship, and reflection, and teach her how to rely on God for strength, guidance, and wisdom in her daily life. And finally, we can take heart, because whenever we pray about discipling other women, we are praying his heart back to him. 

Whether you are a young woman full of zeal and passion, a mother navigating the joys and challenges of raising children, a woman in the richness of midlife, or a wise elderly woman offering the gift of your accumulated wisdom, this can be the season when you become the mentor you wish you always had.

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Sheryl Jacob is a follower of Jesus, wife to Sujith, and mom of three (Elijah, Ezra, and Anaya). She is also a Marriage and Family Therapist. She thoroughly enjoys hosting competitive game nights, listening to podcast, and is passionate about teaching therapeutic workshops. She and her family serves Jesus through Cornerstone Church in Mumbai, India.

Father, we give you thanks for the Houston and Dubai Conferences. 

All that we experienced and enjoyed came from your hand. We don't take it for granted. Instead, we return like that Samaritan leper and fall at your feet in thanksgiving. We thank you for providing places to gather, food to eat, and resources to fund it all. The word was preached, our hearts were stirred, friendships were made, and our faith was strengthened. We thank you. We praise you for all the people who served, in small ways and big, many without being noticed or recognized. You told us that you are not unjust as to overlook their work, their love for your name, and their service to the saints (Heb 6:10). Father, encourage all those who played a part in serving at these conferences to know that their labor was not in vain. 

Father, we intercede for all those who attended. 

It thrills our hearts that there were two gatherings in two different parts of the world with people who love you and want to see the gospel advance among South Asians. It thrills our hearts to get a glimpse of the works you are doing around the world in and through our kinsman according to the flesh. At times, we imagine like Elijah that we are the only ones serving you from our people. But then you remind us that you have many servants that we don’t know about and we rejoice. 

Lord, we pray that the seeds sown during these conferences would bear much fruit. Forbid it Lord that the words we heard should be snatched away by the evil one, or spring up quickly but be burned up by adversity, or be choked out by the cares of this world. Instead, Lord, we ask that there would be hundreds and thousands of acts of obedience that testify to the Word bearing fruit in our lives. Let people pray and give like never before. Let people move to different cities and countries for the sake of your mission. Let people step out in faith trusting that you, who clothe lilies and feed ravens, will provide. Lord of the harvest, is there anyway that you will not answer this prayer? For you are the one who told us to pray it! Lord, since the harvest is plentiful and the laborers are few, send out laborers! Send out professionals who will help plant churches by opening their homes, hosting gatherings, discipling people, evangelizing coworkers, blessing their city, and encouraging their leaders. Send out planters who will lead the charge, take risks, make disciples, preach the word, equip the saints, raise leaders, and shepherd the flock. Send out laborers, Lord! Let the South Asian diaspora become a global missional force for the gospel. 

Father, we intercede for South Asians.

One out of every 5 people on the planet. Don't let it be that they are the highest population in this world, but the least in the world to come. Father, have mercy. Open the eyes of South Asians that have been blinded by the god of this age and cause them to see the light of the gospel. Just as you said, “Let there be light,” and there was light, so shine in darkened hearts so they might see the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ (2 Cor 4:4-6). Father, you desire that none should perish, that all would reach repentance (2 Pet 3:9), and that all would be saved and come to a knowledge of the truth (1 Tim 2:4). So our heart’s desire and our prayer is that they may be saved. 

Hear us, O Lord. In your grace, overlook all the shortcomings in us and our prayers, and answer better than we knew to ask. We look to you with faith and with expectation, curiously waiting to see how you will answer.

In the name of Jesus, Amen. 

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Ajay Thomas helped plant Seven Mile Road Church in Philadelphia where he lives and pastors. He also serves as the Executive Director of The Advance Initiative which exists to see a global movement of gospel-centered, multiethnic churches planted by or among South Asians. He is blessed to serve Jesus with his wife Shainu and their two children. 

Photo by Luis Villasmil on Unsplash

I am tired and weary.

As a knowledge worker, I am weary of thinking, writing, studying, teaching, training, and preparing sermons. Though our labour in the Lord is not vain, it is undoubtedly tiring (1 Cor. 15:58, 2 Cor. 4:7).

As a Christian, my soul is weary of shepherds feeding themselves, people who have shipwrecked their faith, wolves in sheep’s clothing, swindlers who peddle the Word of God for profit, and those who have a form of godliness but deny its power (Ezek. 34:2, 1 Tim. 1:19, Matt. 7:15, 2 Cor. 2:17, 2 Tim. 3:5, Phil. 3:18).

I often feel as the apostle Paul did, “For they all seek their own interests, not those of Jesus Christ” (Phil. 2:21).

To be a pastor is to be in the people-changing business. It is heavy on the heart and anxious for the mind to labour until Christ is formed in the hearts of people (Gal. 4:19, 2 Cor. 11:28).

I am battle-weary from the fight with the world, the enemy, and the flesh. As an approval-seeking person, I am weary of my quickness to please people and slowness to speak truthfully. As it turns out, I too have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out (Rom. 7:18).

Living in Delhi is living in a state of constant negotiation—for space in traffic, time for people, and peace of mind. It is wearisome to live in a rat-racing, power-hungry, fast-paced, slow-learning, self-reliant, God-defiant city. I often feel as David did, “I am for peace, but when I speak, they are for war!” (Ps. 120:7)

It is wearisome to live as a Christian in a country where it is hard to be one, freely.

I am tired and my soul is weary.

This is an excerpt taken with permission from Akshay Rajkumar’s blog on The Gospel Coalition India. Please click to here to continue reading the original article.

Akshay Rajkumar is an author and pastor of a church called Redeemer in New Delhi, where he lives with his wife Shruti and their two daughters. He blogs at The Weary Soul Rejoices, for The Gospel Coalition India. You can follow him on Instagram @thewearysoulrejoices

As cities reopened and churches gathered on Sunday, we eagerly greeted the people we had not seen in a year. But along with embracing our congregants, we had to, once again, embrace the awkward relationship we managed to avoid during the pandemic—our relationship to church attendance.

Pastors have a strange relationship with attendance. We implore our members to gather with other believers since their perseverance relies upon it (Heb. 3:13, 10:24–25). We tell them that doing so is a formative practice that disrupts the individualism that pervades society. We even remind them that gathering in community is one of the core values of our church. But beneath our biblical, sociological, and organizational appeals lie wounds and insecurities that sully our call.

Pastors don’t simply see empty pews on Sunday. We see mirrors that reflect our worst fears back to us—the fear of not being viable as a church anymore, the fear of not being as impactful as other church planters, the fear of not being accepted by our members, the fear that our most fruitful ministry is behind us, and the fear that God has rejected us and the ministry he gave us. 

The mingling of both righteous desire and insecure longing leads us to engage our relationship to church attendance in a few ways. 

INDIFFERENCE

Pastors who are aware of their insecurities can fortify themselves in indifference. They believe the solution to their preoccupation with church attendance is to simply care less. But this approach betrays our calling. For our ministry is to make disciples who love Christ, love the church, and love their neighbors. We are in the Spirit-empowered work of reforming people’s loves, their commitments, their delights, and their values. Therefore, being invested in what our church values, much of which is revealed in how they spend their time, is an unavoidable aspect of our calling. 

ANXIETY

Some pastors know that indifference is not an option. However, since they never pause to consider the insecurities that the empty pews represent to them, they call people to attend out of fear and anxiety. As a result, the gathering becomes a means to another end, a way to assure the pastor that his fears are unrealistic, that he is not forgotten, and that God is still at work in ways that can be recognized by all. He may preach with godly conviction on Sunday morning but will lie awake at night with fear, resolving to commit himself to more control or anxious toil.  

HOPEFUL COMPASSION

Is there a way to avoid both indifference and anxiety? To be invested in what our church values without it becoming where we derive our value? I’m confident there is. If God promises to conform us into the image of his Son (Rom. 8:29), then we can be assured that he will train us to appeal to people as Christ did, not with indifference, nor with anxiety, but with hopeful compassion. 

Jesus teaches us how to grieve and yet be hopeful when people refuse to come to him. He wept over Jerusalem, acknowledged their refusal to come, all while knowing that everything was unfolding according to his Father’s plan (Luke 19:41–42, Matt. 23:37). His confidence in the Father did not prevent him from feeling deeply, and yet his grief did not crush his confidence in the Father’s plan. 

This doesn’t come naturally to us. We often grieve for ourselves when people refuse our call because we view their response as something that confirms our fears about our ministry. But when Jesus grieved, he did not grieve for himself as if their refusal was primarily a reflection of his leadership. No, he grieved for them. He wept because of the opportunity they had missed. 

As a church planter, I long to know the freedom of such tears—to implore others to come to Christ and his church for their sake and not my own. To know that everything needed to be done for my sake has already been accomplished by Jesus, and thus be liberated to feel deep compassion for others with unwavering hope toward God.

The empty pews, although not what we desire, nevertheless present an opportunity for us to grow into what we do desire—to become more like Christ. We do not know if God may will our churches to grow slowly and be small, be more deep than wide, or not grow at all. But we do not need to retreat with indifference nor surrender to anxiety as a way of preparation. We can engage the church, bid them to come, and respond with hopeful compassion even when they don’t. 

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Jason James oversees The Advance Initiative’s content and cohort. He coaches planters and pastors as a certified coach with City to City and Church Multiplication Ministries. He is also the pastor of New Hope Church in Harlem, NY.

Another version of this article was originally published on the Acts 29 blog.

There are several reasons why our prayers seem unanswered. Here are at least eight reasons mentioned in the Bible:

• Cherished sin: “If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened…” (Ps. 66:18). There are times when God waits to give us what we ask because we continue to cherish sin instead of confessing and turning from it. This is not because God is vengeful towards us and wants to withhold what is good. Instead, it is because he loves us and wants to give us what is best: holiness and intimacy with him.

• The way we treat others: “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way…so that your prayers may not be hindered.” (1 Peter 3:7). This verse reveals how our treatment of others can hinder our prayers.

• Asking with false motives:  “When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.” (James 4:3). God cares about our motivations for asking. It is possible to ask for morally neutral things (promotions, finances, etc), with impure motives. In fact, the context that James refers to isn't something morally neutral, but is actually a good thing. It is in reference to people who want to teach and do the work of ministry.

• Lack of earnestness:  "Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest.” (Matthew 9:37-38). The ESV includes the sense in which we must pray. This is an example of something that God wants to give, but wants to do so through the wholehearted earnest prayers of his disciples.

• Spiritual warfare:  Then he continued, “Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them. But the prince of the Persian kingdom resisted me twenty-one days. Then Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, because I was detained there with the king of Persia." (Daniel 10:12-13). This passage seems to indicate that Daniel sought the Lord in fasting and prayer for three weeks, but spiritual warfare was the reason for the delayed response.

• Faith:  If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. (James 1:5-7). There are times when God chooses to act apart from faith, like healing the man who was born blind, who did not even know Jesus (John 9). But this isn't always the case. In the verse above, it appears that God is willing to say yes to a prayer for wisdom, but not everyone can receive it. A person who doubts because he is "double-minded," or fundamentally divided about God, will not be able to receive the answer. We are also told, "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." (Hebrews 11:6)

• Perseverance: "Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up...“For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, ‘Even though I don’t fear God or care what people think, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won’t eventually come and attack me!’” And the Lord said, “Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off?" (Luke 18:1, 4-7). Jesus told this parable to encourage perseverance in prayer. God desires to give us good things, but he also wants us to develop perseverance. There may be multiple reasons for this. It could be to sanctify us, help us develop trust, instill patience within us, expose false beliefs about him, purify our motives, develop character, or simply because it isn’t God’s timing.

• God has answered:  "Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:8-9). There are times when God has answered, but the answer is that his grace is sufficient for us. He has decided not to give us what we are asking so that we could experience greater joy, grace, strength, and power as we depend upon him.

While these are some of the reasons the Bible gives for why our prayers seem unanswered, we should remember that God is not constrained by us. He is free to answer in any way he pleases (Psalm 115:3). And when we are tempted to think that he is withholding something good, let us remember that "…he who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" (Romans 8:32).

God has shown that he is willing to give his best (His only Son), even when we are at our worst (yet still sinners). Therefore, if our prayers seem unanswered, it is because he is at work for our good. If your prayers seem unanswered, seek godly counsel in your community to help you discern what good thing God may be saying or doing in this season of your life.

On June 21, 2015, we paused our sermon series to acknowledge the horror that gripped our nation. Dylann Roof attended a Bible study at Emmanuel AME Church in Charleston, South Carolina, and proceeded to murder nine people as they began to pray. We didn't know what to do or say but we knew our church would grieve together.

Immediately after the service, a woman approached me and asked if the elders would be willing to address the events that took place at Standing Rock. This was a genuine concern. She read that Native Americans were forced off their land and wondered if her Christian brothers and sisters cared. We did care, but we immediately sensed the challenge that loomed.

There is no scarcity of evil in this world and our congregation cares deeply about a diversity of issues in society. If we avoid addressing it, we implicitly disciple them to believe God has nothing to say to the issues that matter to them, and that they should therefore compartmentalize the good news they hear on Sunday and the breaking news they hear throughout the week. 

At the same time, we prayerfully plan our ministries. We resist the tide of unrelenting news that would either drown the church or dictate its direction. So how do we respond to breaking news?

We must develop a philosophy of ministry, a framework that can be applied to every event that will help us discern how to respond in a way that worships God and loves the people we lead. Here are three critical categories to consider.

WHY: FIND OUR LOVE

It is important to first identify our motivations. If, as Augustine suggests, we are carried by our loves, then we must locate the love that impels us to speak.1

But love can be complicated. It isn’t just love for God’s glory that motivates us. We love the approval of others as well. At times, we are tempted to speak so that our silence will not be heard. Our social media feeds transform into a platform for press releases that take a moral stance on a recent event. The pressure to say something is another way to practice our righteousness before others so that we would be approved by them.

But some are tempted to silence for the same reason. They want to say something but fear that people in the church will leave, that we will be accused of misusing authority to mislead the church, and that it will create a precedent and expectation for us to exhaustively address all the ills of society. 

In other words, while the responses may be different, the love of those who say something or say nothing may nevertheless be the same — the approval of others. And as long as we do not love God’s glory above all, our public addresses will not be truly righteous, nor will our silence be an appropriate use of our authority.

WHEN: FIND WHAT’S PRESENT

Breaking news promises to be urgent. It all feels so pressing. So how do we choose? We must discern what is presently felt by the majority our church over what is pressing. For example, leaders who live in racially divided neighborhoods do not have the privilege of avoiding local news of police brutality because every time a police officer shoots an unarmed black man in America, it leaves many wounded in his church.

However, there are some tragedies that are present in other ways. It doesn’t happen to us or near us but is nevertheless felt as the nation collectively grapples with it. It becomes a burden they carry into the gathering. It shapes the way they view God, the church, and neighbor. In that sense, our silence can create a vacuum of leadership that social media and pundits will gladly fill.

In the last several months alone, our churches have heard about a Russian invasion, mass shootings, school shootings, political hearings, Supreme Court rulings, and war in the Middle East.

The sheer number of tragedies we read about every day can desensitize us. But once in a while something breaks through that awakens the entire nation to evil and we stagger to make sense of it together — like elementary school children massacred in Uvalde, TX. 

Although our church didn't personally know anyone affected by this, the horror was present and deeply felt. As their pastor, I knew that I needed to make space for this grief and help them respond. Not all of it has to happen on Sunday. We can use discernment on the best medium for addressing it. However, when there is more suffering than we can know, we must live within the limits of the people and place God gave us and prioritize only that which is truly present to them.

WHAT: FIND JESUS’S WORDS

Once we have identified our love, the issues present, we can finally speak. But at this point, what do we say? 

As leaders, we are humbled by the tremendous amount of trust people give us in helping them navigate sexual addiction, marital conflict, and childhood hurts. But we soon discover that there are many things that are beyond us. Holding a position in ministry does not guarantee that we will have enough experience or expertise in addressing all the events that affect society. What authority do we have to speak to these things?

Any authority that we have has been given to us first by God and then by people. Additionally, we must remember the purpose of this granted authority: we are called to make disciples. People trust us to help them discover what it means to follow Jesus amid the news they’ve heard. 

Our words are only authoritative insofar as we say what the Bible says. The moment we veer from it, we rely on some other kind of authority  —  the authority of our relationship, position, or reputation. And while all of these things can be helpful, the church is best helped by knowing Jesus’s words for what has occurred. Therefore, we weigh our words with other leaders first, those who can contradict us and help us discover the ways that God’s Word speaks to us today.

We will never be able to address everything that happens between South Carolina and Standing Rock, but when we do, may it be love for the one who first loved us, love for his people, and his words that guide us. In devastation and grief, yet with much discernment and grace, we can declare the good news of Jesus Christ amid the breaking news of the world.

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Jason James oversees The Advance Initiative’s content and cohort. He coaches planters and pastors as a certified coach with City to City and Church Multiplication Ministries. He is also the pastor of New Hope Church in Harlem, NY.

Casting vision is an essential part of the church planter’s call. He does it in order to galvanize a team, raise financial support, and call the church to persevere amid challenges. But there is a pain that lingers in the planter’s heart. Ministry is not what he envisioned. Ironically, it was his ability to see what others could not that made him so sure of his calling. But he is not so sure anymore. His eyes have grown weary, waiting for the vision to materialize.

I know this pain too well.

After receiving confirmation from God to plant a church in New York City, we excitedly called family and friends and rehearsed the divine providences that had clarified this call. But somewhere in the journey we mistakenly assumed these providences became a promise that God would bring it to pass exactly as we imagined. 

What should we do when our ministry plans don’t go the way we pictured? How can we find the strength to cast vision for the future when we live in a graveyard of unfulfilled hopes? What happens when our disappointments cause us to question our calling, our ability to hear from God, or—even worse—God’s character?

Greater Vision

We pay little attention to the way our imagination runs ahead when God calls. Humbled that God would weave our story into his plan for the world, we start to wonder, What then will this church plant be? We waste no time imagining it must mean visible success and significance.

But the Bible is filled with examples of people who heard God’s call, and (unlike most of us) even heard an explicit promise of what he would accomplish. Nevertheless, even for them its fulfillment was not what they imagined—nor within their lifetimes.

Abraham was told his descendants would be as innumerable as the stars. How often did he lie awake under those stars, gazing at the symbols of God’s promise, but without a child? What was it like for him to discover that, unlike the stars, he could easily count his descendants before he died?

God spoke to Moses in a blazing fire. His fearful heart grew confident that God had called him to lead his people into the promised land. But could Moses have known he would wander in a wilderness for 40 years and only see that land from afar?

John the Baptist boldly confessed Jesus as the lamb who takes away the sins of the world. But in prison did he ever question his confession? What unmet expectations led him to ask, “Are you the one who is to come, or shall we look for another?” (Matt. 11:3)?

Each of these men may have tried to reconcile what they heard with what they experienced, what God revealed with what they imagined it would be. But God did not crush these bruised reeds. He won’t crush us either. 

We imagined a compelling vision for our church when God called, but there is a cloud of witnesses who urge us to look beyond what we envisioned, to gaze at Jesus himself. Like he was for Abraham, Jesus must be the one we long to see (John 8:56). Like he was for Moses, Jesus must become the treasure greater than all the rewards of ministry (Heb. 11:26). And like John, we must find the blessing of bringing our questions to Christ but not stumbling on account of him (Matt. 11:6). 

We must be mesmerized by him, looking beyond the stars to the Creator who numbers and names them. For one of these days, the clouds will come, and every sign and symbol confirming our call will be gone. What will we gaze upon then?

Greater Surrender

My wife and I started praying about planting a church in New York City in December 2011. We moved there two years later, assuming the same assurances that compelled us to the city would continue at the same pace. But God had other plans. 

We were unemployed for nearly a year after we arrived. We struggled to develop relationships and a sense of belonging in the neighborhood. After three years of not bearing fruit, and grieving that loss, I became the lead pastor of an existing church. A year after I became its pastor, we had to close the church down.

I struggled to understand. Why did God speak so convincingly, only to will our worst fears to life? Of course, he willed so much more than that. We didn’t know his plan included not just our success, but our total surrender as well. It was only in 2020—nine years after those initial prayers, and two weeks before the pandemic hit our city—that we planted New Hope Church in Harlem. 

Church planters know we must surrender our plans to the Lord. But nothing may be more painful than surrendering our vision for the church, especially when the identity we prize is pastor, planter, and visionary leader. The success of our vision becomes intertwined with who we are; and therefore, to give up our vision is to have nothing left at all.

But Jesus shows us how to surrender when the thought of loss leads us to be sorrowful unto death (Matt. 26:38). He did not surrender as an aspiring teacher or a dynamic prophet, but as the beloved Son of God. And when we surrender as Jesus did, not as pastors and planters, not as servants and leaders, but as beloved sons and daughters of God, then what we lose will never compare to the treasure we still possess. We can cast vision and hold it with an open hand. We can call people to the glory we still see—even when ministry isn’t what we envisioned. 

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Jason James oversees The Advance Initiative’s content and cohort. He coaches planters and pastors as a certified coach with City to City and Church Multiplication Ministries. He is also the pastor of New Hope Church in Harlem, NY.

This post originally appeared on The Gospel Coalition’s blog.

Motivation can come in waves. And when your career and call demands consistent motivation, like it does for those of us in ministry, it can be especially challenging. Our work requires us to motivate others to love God, love one another, and love their neighbors. We want them to trust, to commit, to serve out of joy. But when we are the ones who lack the motivation, who struggle to do the things that only we can do, and are called to do, it can leave us feeling lost.  

This is one of the reasons that many pastors consider quitting. But if we trace the source of our unmotivated state, we may find causes that go beyond our habits and disciplines. Can you identify with any of these reasons for your lack of motivation?

SPIRITUAL STRUGGLE

Before entering full-time vocational ministry, I thought pastors would never struggle with spiritual lows. After all, if their work requires them to read their Bibles, pray with people, and share their faith, shouldn’t it create a fire for God? If anyone had it together, I assumed it was the leader of the church. But after becoming a Christian in my early 20s, I realized that seasons of spiritual lows happen to even the most faithful.

Consider Elijah, the great prophet of Israel, who fell into depression after a season of great ministry (1 Kings 19). He needed the Lord to strengthen him again. Other times, our spiritual desert is unrelated to depression and is the result of sin. We wandered from God and our gap in motivation became as wide as our distance from him.

In these situations, we find motivation for our work when we remember that he loves us, is not far from us, and calls us to return to him. Your identity is that of a child of God. Returning to serve out of that place of belonging and attachment will change your focus and spark motivation. If you find yourself serving out of an obligation to “do the work” and not out of your position as a child of God, you will eventually be drained and will be unmotivated over time.  

BURNOUT

The Mayo Clinic describes job burnout as: “a special type of work-related stress — a state of physical or emotional exhaustion that also involves a sense of reduced accomplishment and loss of personal identity.”1

Ministry leaders who feel that they are so needed that they cannot say no are often exhausted. There are times when we struggle to say no because there is no one else to carry the ministry burden with us. But other times, it is because we feel something else is at stake and will be lost – such as our identity, our ideas of success, or the approval of others. 

If you are someone who struggles to say “no” to ministry needs, I suggest a return to the call of Jesus for discipleship as a solution. This means we refocus our efforts away from doing all the ministry ourselves to equipping others to do the work of ministry. Regardless of the breadth of your ministry, you are called to train, teach, and disciple others to serve Jesus. As you find and utilize partners in ministry, give away some of the things that you are doing. I have found this especially helpful as pastoral needs arise. I say “no” to meeting the need myself, and say “yes” to connecting them to our growing team of servants in our church who take on the much needed tasks of care, so it doesn’t all rely on me. This not only serves the church, but also serves me in helping me avoid the burnout that kills motivation.  

CRITICISM

There is no scarcity of opinions in the church. After pouring your heart out in a sermon and feeling the joy of having preached as faithfully as you can, the comments and critiques of your work can deflate you. And that is just one example. Criticism can find us in nearly every area of our ministry. How we choose to respond can make all the difference. If we aim to please people instead of God, our motivation will suffer.

This doesn’t mean we don’t need feedback. We just need to be watchful for who gives us feedback and how we listen. As I have faced criticism and conflict, I have allowed three groups of people to speak into my life.  My wife will tell me exactly what she thinks is true. I can trust her, because she always seeks my best.  My close friends can listen to my heart when I am going through these seasons and offer clear counsel that is biblical and true. Pastors on my team have been helpful for me to sift through what is helpful and true and what is destructive in terms of criticism. In other words, having people who care about you, understand you, and are willing to speak the truth in grace will make sure that their criticism doesn’t leave you deflated, but motivated for God’s best in your life and ministry. 

In 24 years of full-time ministry, I have spent many seasons in search of motivation and have felt the sting of trying to do the work without my heart truly in it. Although such seasons can be expected and happen to us all, knowing why it is happening can be the first step to finding our heart again. The good news that called us into this work is the one that gives us hope now. Jesus has the grace available to meet us wherever we are and give us the motivation we need. 

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Mohan grew up in the Washington, DC area. After coming to faith in Jesus during college, he bean a journey toward full-time ministry, taking him through Philadelphia, India, and finally Chicago. He was called to the role of Lead Pastor of CityLine Bible Church, a multi-ethnic, inter-generational church located just outside of Chicago. He and his wife Susan have three children. He has an MBA in Economic Development and an MA in Biblical Studies from Moody Bible Institute. He loves teaching God’s word and is passionate about seeing people take the call to discipleship seriously in their lives.

I sit in a dimly lit room with women who share stories, some filled with shame, some of regret, some saturated with pain. Bottles and blades, innocence undone, haunting tales where a smile is a stranger, and hope is absent. I lean in and tell them they are brave. They are. They tell parts of their stories that they have never revealed before. Things that have happened to them. Things that they have done.

I am familiar.

I, too, grew up like most of our South Asian families and communities, burying my shame and displaying the social media version of me, hoping to be elevated with honor. Pretension and performance became the norm, and I became an expert at numbing and hiding. 

Yet, as it often does, we cannot stand how triggers or reminders make us feel. It leaks out of us, distorted and destructive. Some of us lean on ways to escape through addictions or guilty pleasures, while some of us throw ourselves into performance and perfection, all the while using fig-leaf attempts to cover up our shame. I’ve done both.

However, our Creator did not wire us to hide. We were made to be known. So here in this room, in this little community of women, we recreate the Garden. We remind each other about our original design, the cross, and the One who is resurrection and life. Each week they show up, they stop pulling away and start to feel deep. I sit, and I cry with them. We face the brokenness together. For their own pain. For each other’s. They begin to discover that to be fully loved is to be fully known, and shame no longer gets the oxygen to breathe. 

But how does refusing to hide restore honor?

In the Gospel of Luke, we discover a story about Jesus restoring a woman’s honor. He was on his way to heal the daughter of an honored synagogue leader but stopped for an unclean, bleeding woman, who was covered in shame. Yet this woman risked it all because she placed her trust in the only One who can heal. She attempts to reach Jesus, if only to touch the fringe of his robe, because if she were to touch anyone, they, too, would be named "unclean." So, as Luke describes it, she tries so hard not to be seen, probably because she’s lived for so long with her head down and pushed away. Yet here, Jesus stops. He turns. He sees her. Jesus publicly calls out for her, and he honors her. Though her shame is made known, it no longer gives her a name.  Jesus calls this woman “daughter.” Once scorned for shame, she is now honored because of her faith. 

What would it be like to have this faith? If we stepped into the light and came close to the One who promises to never leave? To approach Him instead of trying to hide the painful parts of ourselves, and entrust ourselves to the One who sees, knows, and still demonstrates His deep affection for us? 

We’ll find that He calls us not only to confess privately to Him, but to one another too (James 5:16). He invites us to experience a transformation that reflects the relational intimacy of the Trinity, the very image we were made in. So when we share our stories with safe people, we open the door to leave isolation and fear. Love and connection bloom. The lying narrative begins to lose its power. Though many of us have been hurt in relationships, we begin to realize that we were created to find healing in them, too. Simply naming and confessing our broken pieces with those who choose to stay close is a step towards feeling known and loved. The incredible thing is that although shame entices us to hide, being known is what brings about His restored honor.

This is transformative healing. This is how God seeks to do His work, in and through imperfect people like you and me. He is eager to restore and redeem His original design in us and through us by the power of the resurrection, if we are willing to join Him in the journey. It may mean uncovering memories or reckoning with a family history we would rather hide. But we can embrace the courage He so freely offers us. We can trust that the broken pieces we bring will be held together by a God who offers an abundance of joy and freedom – the joy of having our honor restored and the freedom of living unashamed. 

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Sherry Varughese has served in pastoral ministry for almost two decades with her husband in New York. She has facilitated healing groups within the church as a trained trauma facilitator through Mending the Soul and completed an intensive pastoral counseling training program at Redeemer Counseling Services. Sherry is currently obtaining her license and degree in Marriage and Family Therapy, specializing in Trauma-Informed Therapy at Transformations Counseling Group in Long Island. She is committed to partnering in the Gospel work of reshaping fractured stories into whole, redeemed relationships with God, others, and within themselves.

I know there are so many debates out there about church. Should I go to a multiethnic church or an ethnic-specific church? Should I go to a small neighborhood church or a big megachurch? Is my church missional? Does my church care about justice? These are all important questions.

We may have unfairly put ourselves in a predicament. This either-or scenario of ethnic-specific or multiethnic is too crude of a binary solution for an incredibly nuanced issue. What if the question was not where do I go, but who am I in these polarized spaces? Am I bringing all of who I am into this place called church such that it causes true joy in the Lord for others and myself? I am not trying to cop out of answering the question of either-or, but I am suggesting that the answer to the where question is hollow when the who question is not addressed first.

God, the Father, wants to make you into his child and that can happen in any place. I know that this may seem like an impossible goal. But here’s my best advice to you.

First, don’t give up on the discipline of church attendance. I realize that churches get it wrong. But churches get it right too. God desires for you to be his temple, to be a living stone for his temple, and to take part in the fellowship of believers. Let’s not give up meeting together, especially as we see the day of the Lord is getting nearer every passing day (Hebrews 10:25). It is critical to gather (ecclesia) with others, virtually or in person— in ethnic spaces or not. I believe it is part of God’s plan for each of us and the world.

Second, invest long term in a place because it is part of forming your character. Whether that space is ethnic-specific or multiethnic, invest in it. Give yourself to that place for several years, maybe even a decade or more. Invest your time and energy within the various ministries at the church. Invest your resources by tithing and giving cheerfully in that space. Make deep friendships with a few people so they can keep you accountable. Take a risk and step into leadership roles within the church. Be faithful in the small things and eventually the Lord will put you in charge of larger things.

Third, effect change within that church as the Lord leads you. If you see something that feels contrary to the mission and vision of Christ’s body, then say something in the appropriate way in the right channels. Connect with trusted leaders and wrestle through Scripture together. In the multiethnic church, stand for racial justice and equity throughout the church. In the ethnic-specific church, stand for contextualized mission toward the unreached within your ethnic demographic. Confront complacency with grace and truth.

Fourth, recruit and invite others to join you in mission. If God is slowly cultivating joy in you, then bring others along to multiply this joy. This shows church members and leaders that you truly believe in what God is doing among them. Sure, the church might have flaws, but God is present and working in each life. Therefore, invite your coworkers, invite your Asian non-Christian neighbors, and invite those that are dechurched or burned-out, not because it is such a good place, but because God is multiplying joy. Be bold and trust that your local church body will flourish by making invitations. Don’t just recruit individuals, but invite whole families to follow Jesus and join in the mission of God. As Asian Americans, God has given us unique networking abilities that can be filled with kingdom energy.

There will be places of misunderstanding along the way as you engage in the aforementioned steps—it’s going to happen. But stay committed. I believe that God will bring great joy into your life and to the church. That rich sense of community, discipleship, and evangelism can produce a fully integrated joy within you over time.

It’s not really about which church in particular, but rather what God is cultivating in you and through you in that space. Again, it’s not about consumeristic happiness, but a deep joy found in a process of remaining committed to a community.

Be courageous enough to bring your vibrant Asian heritage, your diasporic journeys, your cultural dissonance, and your racial realities into one place and remain committed there. I think if we do, then deep joy will multiply in that place. Joy that reverberates into every dark corner of our cities and countries. Joy that reaches people that look like me. From dilapidated farmhouses on the outskirts of the city, to the megachurch in the center of the city, may the Lord make us the right people in each of those spaces to bring forth his joy. Yes, joy: unstoppable, unshakeable, and everlasting.

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Taken and adapted from Learning Our Names: Asian American Christians on Identity, Relationships, and Vocation by Sabrina S. Chan, Linson Daniel, E. David de Leon, and La Thao. Copyright (c) 2022 by InterVarsity Christian Fellowship/USA and Linson T. Daniel. Published by InterVarsity Press, Downers Grove, IL. www.ivpress.com

Linson Daniel (Indian American) is associate pastor of Metro Church in Dallas, Texas. He previously served as the national coordinator for South Asian InterVarsity and is a doctoral student at Fuller Theological Seminary. He is co-author of the book Learning Our Names.

When the Lord called us overseas to plant a church, our first concern was how it would affect our children. We did not know what to expect as we transitioned from familiarity to uncertainty. And like most parents, we were concerned about the unique challenges our children would face.  

Would they find it difficult to form new friendships? Would they feel isolated or excluded? What would this decision do to their emotional health?  We wanted to prepare them, emotionally and mentally, for this drastic change. Through conversations, journaling, grieving, and processing our anxieties, we found comfort and courage for the call of God for our family. 

Whether you are moving to a new city, state, or country, here are practical ways parents can equip children before stepping into full-time vocational ministry. 

HOW TO PREPARE

Your children will experience change. Some changes include switching schools, starting new friendships, leaving everyday activities, or adjusting to a new environment. Parents can prepare their children by simply processing the changes with them.  Ask them questions like: “How are you feeling about the upcoming changes? What questions do you have? What do you think you will miss most? What concerns you?  What are you looking forward to? What can I do to help you feel more prepared for the change?”  

We cannot underestimate how disorienting this decision can be for your children. However, allowing them to ask questions, listening to their concerns, and helping them understand what to expect are all helpful ways to both grieve and involve them in the process.  

HOW TO LEAD

Change is not the only challenge. When boundaries between ministry and family easily blur, children are often impacted first. Pastors may have a taxing schedule, which limits the time they can spend with their children. For example, they may work long hours, attend evening or weekend events, or travel for ministry purposes. But parents can lead their family well by being attuned to their children’s thoughts and emotions, prioritizing time for sabbath rest, and scheduling regular activities with the family.   

When pastors' children feel pressure to live up to high moral standards and be excellent examples to the congregation, parents can remind their children that the aim of our obedience is love for Jesus, and that he is our righteousness on our best and worst days.

If you are called into a context where your children lack friendships, where most families frequently move, or peers live far away, parents can seek out opportunities to connect with other parents in the community, such as volunteering at the child’s school, organizing playdates, participating in sports and music or hobbies with shared interests.  Parents can also take the initiative by hosting a game night or inviting other families over for dinner to help build relationships.  

These are just a few of the challenges that they may face, and the solutions are almost never easy. Nevertheless, one of the best ways parents can lead their children is by providing a supportive and safe space for them. Create a family culture of sitting down together and talking through hard things.  Answer their questions and validate their feelings by letting them know that it is okay to feel upset or hurt by what is happening.  Listen to their concerns and reassure them that they are not responsible for what is happening.  

THE REWARDS CHILDREN REAP

But it isn’t all sacrifice. There are rewards too! Serving and leading a ministry provides unique opportunities for children to experience the process of starting a new church from scratch. In addition, children can learn valuable skills such as leadership, identifying new giftings, communication, and interpersonal skills.  Parents can involve their children in ministry and provide opportunities to serve others in the community. This involvement can help create a positive sense of belonging, and help them discover the deeper joy of serving the Lord and witnessing his hand. 

Depending on your calling, your children may learn about new cultures, lifestyles, and customs. Your children may interact with people from diverse backgrounds, ethnicities, religions, and socio-economic backgrounds. As a result, they will learn ways to connect with people with different perspectives and appreciate their differences. 

But above all of these, children can develop a deeper faith and grow closer to God as they experience firsthand how a church is built and how it serves the community. Their faith is made flesh before their eyes as their parents react and respond with trust in God in difficult situations.  

When parents share their faith experiences with their children, including testimonies of God’s faithfulness, answered prayers, and moments of spiritual growth, children see how their parents’ relationship with Jesus impacts their daily lives, which encourages them to seek out their own faith journey. 

As a parent, I am still learning to ask lots of questions and have conversations with my children 

regarding their faith and their experiences in ministry. We want to create a family culture that processes our grief, celebrates joyful moments, and prays in secret more than serving in public. The Lord has been kind and gracious by allowing us to not only see the burden, but also the gift of ministry. By his grace, my children have learned to trust Jesus more and depend upon him for all their needs. I hope that as we look back, we will see that it was the Lord preparing our children, not merely for ministry, but for a life of strong faith and love.

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Sheryl Jacob is a follower of Jesus, wife to Sujith, and mom of three (Elijah, Ezra, and Anaya). She is also a Marriage and Family Therapist. She thoroughly enjoys hosting competitive game nights, listening to podcast, and is passionate about teaching therapeutic workshops. She and her family serves Jesus through Cornerstone Church in Mumbai, India.

I was 14 years old when I first watched pornography. I had no idea images could puncture the heart. I didn’t know the poison would linger after Jesus saved my soul. At age 24, by God’s mercy working through the gospel, community, and repentance—again and again—I finally experienced a freedom I never dreamed was possible.

That was 2007. Looking back now, I can see there was a decade when I struggled. I struggled not only to fight temptation but also to believe I was forgiven. Seasons of success made me feel like I stood on a mountaintop, but often I was on the precipice of failure. And when I fell, I earnestly prayed for forgiveness, and I believed God had forgiven me. So why did the pain still linger? Why didn’t I feel forgiven?

Some friends will tell you to “forgive yourself,” as if you’re the warden of your guilt, holding the key to your own freedom. Others correct this advice. They say no word of forgiveness is more decisive than God’s, encouraging you to trust his Word because feelings aren’t facts.

I’ve received both kinds of counsel. And while I agree with the latter, I didn’t know how to “believe more.” I wondered, Why am I so unaffected by this truth? Why can’t I find comfort? I’ve learned that to be comforted by grace, we must locate our grief.

Locating Our Grief

Here’s what I mean: Only when we recognize that we’re feeling grief and are honest about what we believe we’ve lost can we see how God’s grace applies to that sadness.

What are some common places grief is located?

1. Grief for offending God: a loss of intimacy.

Godly sorrow is appropriate when we sin. All our sins are primarily against God, and we ought to grieve when we grieve his Spirit (Eph. 4:29–32). When we cause God grief, we experience a loss of intimacy with him. And even after our communion with God has been restored, we can fear he’ll no longer show warmth toward us. But our comfort when we’ve grieved God is that if we love him, it’s because he first loved us (1 John 4:19). We must remember that the Father moved toward us and the Son loved us unto death, not when we were at our best but at our worst (Rom. 5:8).

2. Grief for grace given: a perceived loss of justice.

Godly sorrow, which should be a doorway to his grace, can sometimes become a revolving door of depression. For those with a strong sense of justice, God’s grace can be difficult to receive, and reminders of it may plunge us deeper into despair. Why? It feels unfair to be loved by God when we’re guilty. We’d rather be punished and sit in our sorrow. Those who feel this way need not only the comfort of God’s grace but also the comfort of his justice. In Christ, all our sins have been punished. There was a just judgment of our sins upon the cross. So God is entirely just to forgive us (1 John 1:9). He is both just and the justifier of those who have faith in Jesus (Rom. 3:26).

3. Grief for grace needed: a loss of perceived strength.

If our grief still lingers after knowing the comfort of God’s grace and justice, it may be that we mourn the death of our self-perception. Our sin as well as God’s justice and grace toward it expose that we’re not as virtuous as we thought, not as strong as we imagined. We’re shell-shocked at what we’re capable of in the face of temptation. Could this be the source of our sorrow—the reality that God always knew our sin but we’ve struggled to admit it until now; the truth that we’re weak, that we need a Savior far more than we imagined?

There are times when what haunts us most is not our sin but our need for grace. But truly the death of our false perception is necessary. We must feel this loss to see ourselves as we really are—broken sinners in need of the Savior.

Locating His Gaze

We’re not the first to overestimate our strength and weep bitterly for it (Matt. 26:75). When Jesus told Peter that he’d deny him three times, Peter assured himself and said, “Even if I must die with you, I will not deny you” (Matt. 26:31–35). His relationship with Jesus had begun with an awareness of his need for mercy: “Depart from me for I am a sinful man, O Lord” (Luke 5:8). But somewhere along the way, Peter started to view himself as one who wouldn’t succumb to temptations others would.

So, what comfort is there for us when our inflated sense of self leads us to be sifted like wheat (Luke 22:31)? We can accept the loss of our perceived strength and make peace with the fact that apart from Jesus we can do nothing. We may still feel the shock of our sins, but there’s freedom knowing God is not shocked. No, he gazes on us as Jesus looked at Peter. He sees through our pretenses and spiritual bravado. He’s not distracted by our inflated promises. He fixes his eyes on our limits, weaknesses, and sins (Luke 22:61), and then he mercifully determines to show us his grace, strength, and power.

We can rest in the truth that Jesus knows the ones he called. He knows the dimensions and limits of our love. He wants us to know there are no limits to his.

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This article was originally published on The Gospel Coalition.

Jason James oversees The Advance Initiative’s content and cohort. He coaches planters and pastors as a certified coach with City to City and Church Multiplication Ministries. He is also the pastor of New Hope Church in Harlem, NY.

Mental health is an important issue that affects many people, including those in church communities. The church has an important role to play in addressing mental health challenges by providing support, resources, and care to those who are struggling. By acknowledging mental health struggles and promoting awareness, the church can help reduce the stigma surrounding mental illness and create a safe and supportive environment where people can find healing and hope. Here are six ways you can navigate this effectively.

1. Compassion: Lead with grace.

The way we show up matters. When people are vulnerable about their grief, sorrow, fears, and traumas, we should meet them with compassion. As they start to share, you may quickly see areas of needed growth or sinful patterns, but be slow to point out sin. Listening with empathy without judgment helps build trust and allows the relationship to keep moving forward. Jesus modeled this pattern—He met people with grace and compassion even though he knew their sin issues.

So, how can you lead with grace? Let people know that you see their hurt and brokenness and be tender towards them. Recognize that their suffering comes from the brokenness of the world as well as their own. Take time to listen and grieve with them. Do not force them to be a certain person or arrive at a certain place in their journey immediately.

They are in the process of being made new and having their story redeemed. Your compassionate response can play a vital role in their journey.

2. Communication: Talk about mental health struggles from the pulpit.

One powerful way to engage with the needs of the people you serve is to normalize discussions around mental health. Weaving mental health topics into sermons, sharing your struggles vulnerably, and offering counseling seminars for the church on topics such as anxiety and depression go a long way in reducing the stigma. The more you normalize conversations around these issues, the more you cultivate a culture of safety and connection in your community and the more you help people find the courage to seek the care they need.

For resources on integrating mental health topics into sermons or small groups, I recommend Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Pete Scazzero.

3. Curiosity: Value the story behind the person.

Our life experiences, both the things that hurt us and the things that are positive, impact our view of self, others, and God. Move toward people with curiosity and start to see how their past experiences affect them. As you understand them better, you can provide counsel that is relevant and meaningful to their specific story. With a better understanding of their own stories, they also can connect to God in a new way and get a deeper understanding of how He cares for them.

We can start with prompts or questions such as:

• Tell me more about what you are experiencing.

• Tell me more about why that was hurtful or why it made you angry.

• When else have you experienced similar emotions or reactions in the past?

• How does what you experienced make you feel about yourself? About other people?

• About God?

Even if their response doesn’t make sense to us, whether it feels like an overreaction or illogical, it is important to listen and hear where they are coming from. Attentive listening and patience can help us connect their thoughts and feelings with their overall story.

4. Complexity: Consider the whole person and do not oversimplify to the spiritual.

When you take the time to learn about someone's story, you gain a better understanding of the complex emotions and experiences they may be going through. As humans, we are not just spiritual beings but also physical beings intricately designed by God.

Often, when people express they are struggling with their thoughts and feelings, it is easy to categorize those things as merely heart or spiritual issues. However, it is essential to recognize that their nervous system and physical body also play a critical role in their emotional responses.

Failing to recognize the complexity behind the nervous system and emotions may lead you to try to fix the person too quickly, only to find the solution ineffective. If you feel unsure about how to handle this complexity, you can learn more about trauma-informed care or refer to professional counseling. By doing so, you can approach others with empathy and understanding, and help them find the support they need.

5. Care: Provide a thoughtful structure for appropriate level of care.

You can support the person with pastoral counseling if your church feels equipped to do so. If the complexity of the situation or the person’s needs require additional care, you can refer them to professional counseling. It is helpful to build a referral list and to consider having a fund through the church to sponsor sessions.

Consider developing a pastoral response team or identify a few church members who can continue to check in with people as they seek professional care. You do not want to make people feel that they are being outsourced, but that counseling is an added layer of care they can receive.

6. Christ: Trust in Christ as you embrace your limitations.

Lastly, trust Christ and rely on Him as you care for those around you because He is the one who ultimately heals. Knowing that healing lies with Jesus, embrace your limitations and humbly recognize that you can only do so much to bring about change and healing in others. This should liberate you instead of invoking fear. You can cast your cares on Him when the need or the suffering seems too much. You can walk with Him as He leads you in meeting people where they are and as He brings them into greater healing and transformation. God is redeeming all of our stories and making all things new.

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This article was originally published by Redeemer Counseling Services Toolkit Newsletter.

Jyothi a licensed Mental Health Therapist and clinical supervisor at Redeemer Counseling Services. She has experience in trauma-informed therapy, and is also certified in Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) — providing treatment for trauma and care for those struggling with anxiety and depression. She is passionate about empowering people to understand their unique story and how it has shaped their perception of themselves, others, and even God. You can follow her on instagram.

It was my first time preaching at the church. I looked at the congregation before I climbed the stage and saw people I had come to know and love, men and women with whom I had laughed and mourned, families that had shared my dinner table, and people who had invited me into their homes. But despite their warm welcome, I realized that, for most of them, this would be the first time they sat under the preaching of a non-white pastor. And most of them hadn’t noticed.

Although I grew up in an Indian church, I have ministered as a minority in majority culture contexts for the past thirteen years. I currently serve in a predominantly white church in the Oklahoma City area and have experienced many of the joys that minority ministers get to experience: participating in the vision of every tribe, tongue, and nation gathering under the lordship of Christ (Rev. 7:9), joining the artifacts of my culture with the best of “white” culture to create a more beautiful vision of community, and exposing cultural idols while realizing the idols and prejudices in my own heart. Leading as a minority in the local church has been a gift. 

However, there are also many challenges. It takes more work to find natural touchpoints and commonalities with those who look different from me. I have often been misunderstood or had my heritage and experiences gaslit. I feel disconnected from my cultural heritage, and most of the people around me are either unaware or can’t relate. However, one of the biggest challenges is not anything that others have caused. It is the unanswered question that sits in the back of my mind. Do they truly accept me? 

DESIGNED WITH DIFFERENCES

At the root of the question of whether I’m accepted by others is a sense of doubt about my own worth. Leading in a majority-white context quickly revealed cultural differences in how we approached ministry. My deference to authority was interpreted as being passive because I didn’t take the initiative. My idea of excellence paled in comparison to what my counterparts produced. These differences fueled the internal struggle with my own insecurities and sense of adequacy to pastor in a way that is on par with my white brothers. I compared myself to the leaders I wanted to be like and found myself wanting. 

Nevertheless, there are real gifts that Indians (and all minority experiences) bring. Christianity is not a monolith but consists of God’s manifold wisdom of people from every class and culture who are called into a diverse kingdom. (Ephesians 3:1-13) Indians bring different perspectives to passages of Scripture and theological truths that can challenge normative assumptions. The Bible doesn’t change, but the questions and assumptions we bring to the Bible are shaped by our culture.

For example, eastern cultures bring a vision of community and hospitality that challenge western individualism within the church. Biblical concepts such as shame and honor are readily identified with Indian culture, and so we read the parable of the prodigal son with a greater appreciation of the depths of the younger son’s familial betrayal. Our cultural experiences can allow us to color biblical stories and ideas in a way that are understood more deeply. 

The ability of Indians to connect and contextualize the gospel to other Indians and minorities is a gift that should not be overlooked. Over and over again, I have heard from fellow south Asians that I have been able to uniquely connect, challenge, and encourage them in ways that the other pastors on our team could not. It is not because I’m especially gifted, but often because our shared experiences allow me to connect and empathize in a more intimate way, as a fellow sojourners and exiles (1 Peter 2:11), or as Stanley Hauerwas and William Willimon put it, “resident aliens” who are in the culture, but not of the culture.

The challenge for Indian leaders is to push against the false idea that what we have to offer is not merely different, but somehow inferior. Our experiences, struggles, and strengths are gifts from God to be stewarded for the kingdom. Rather than run away from our culture or lean too heavily into it, we can view it as something God has entrusted to us that we might glorify Him and bring beauty to Jesus’ church. Therefore, the task at hand is not just to appreciate your culture of origin, but to consider God’s purposes in our stories. God has intentionally written our stories for our good and His glory. 

Thankfully, I am part of a team and church that acknowledges and seeks to recognize the different gifts in Christ’s church. It’s not always perfect, and I know it requires patience. But whatever our role, whatever part of the body we are, Jesus says you and I are integral and necessary parts of His body. And that’s enough.

Brice lives in Oklahoma with his wife, Robyn, and two kids: Ellery and Emmaus. Despite his location, he is an avid Texas Longhorn and enjoys sports, reading, and spending time with his family.

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I answered the call to pastoral ministry ten years ago and planted the church where I have been serving as pastor for the past eight years. In the first few years, I wanted to quit every week, sometimes every day.

This is because pastoral ministry can be desirable and undesirable at the same time. It can be desirable because it promises things that appeal to the darker desires of our hearts—the allure of a pulpit, the admiration of people, and the authority to lead. It can be undesirable because it comes with things that test the depth of our character—the weight of a pulpit, the scrutiny of people, and the responsibility to lead.

In addition to this, there are sleepless nights over difficult conversations, anxiety for people who face overwhelming situations, fear when proclaiming the gospel in hostile territory, feelings of inadequacy because of unwanted behavior in your life, frustration and anger over unwanted behavior in the lives of others, and the heavy emotional toll it takes on your marriage and children.

I didn’t always want to be a pastor. I wanted to be a globe-trotting, conference-speaking, book-signing, award-winning, free-thinking writer. People appreciate books by authors more than sermons by pastors, or so I thought. This was the way I could make a genuine difference in the world. Little did I know that the Lord wanted to make a difference in my life, as much as he wanted to make one through my life. And this is true even when it feels like our ministry isn’t making a difference.

HE PURIFIES OUR HEARTS

Pastors can be biased toward a purity of doctrine over a purity of motive. We can be more concerned about the health of our flock than the health of our hearts. But good shepherds watch their lives and their doctrine closely (1 Timothy 4:6). They keep watch over themselves and their flocks (Acts 20:28).

Pastors who are more eager to offer help than to ask for it will find themselves feeling helpless when others are in need. Every pastor who wants to be faithful in ministry needs to rely on the ministry of Jesus, his faithful pastor.

Is the gospel making a difference to your heart? Do you need to keep the Sabbath holy? Do you need to confess something to a trusted friend? Are you working too hard? Are you suppressing grief, concealing sin, carrying shame, or harboring fears? Do you need hear the gospel from someone more than you need to preach it to someone? God can use the pressures we face to purify us.

HE LEADS US TO TRUTH

Spiritual warfare looks less like a horror movie and more like a spy thriller that is full of lies, deceit, and misinformation. The devil is the father of lies. Anytime you are tempted to believe a lie, you may be engaged in spiritual warfare.

Whenever faithful proclamation of the gospel does not produce visible results, we are tempted to believe the lie that God’s word goes out in vain, and therefore, we should stop proclaiming it. Even if we know what is true rationally, the lies can affect us emotionally.

That pain could simply be the sting of a flaming arrow of the enemy that has pierced your heart and poisoned your mind. We answer the lies of the enemy with the promise that Jesus is the head of the church and he will build his church. He uses the challenges we face to lead us back to truths like these so that we would be more than communicators of his word, but convinced of it.

HE DIRECTS OUR EYES TO JESUS

Is it appropriate for us to measure the worth of our ministry? In some ways we must. It is appropriate to examine ourselves for faithfulness to doctrine, eagerness to love, reliance on the Holy Spirit, wholeness in family, and dependence on Christ. But in another sense, we should not even be asking the question.

We are not counted worthy by the difference we make in the lives of others. We are counted worthy by the difference the ministry of Jesus has made to our lives. He has turned orphans into children and traitors into allies. Is there any greater miracle to motivate us in ministry? When we know that his ministry has already made the ultimate difference to us, we can press on in ministry even when it feels like it is not making a difference to anyone else.

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Akshay Rajkumar is an author and pastor of a church called Redeemer in New Delhi, where he lives with his wife Shruti and their two daughters. He blogs at The Weary Soul Rejoices, for The Gospel Coalition India. You can follow him on Instagram @thewearysoulrejoices

My heart broke as I watched the pandemic devastate India. When I shared my grief with a friend in ministry, she said, “Wow, I had no idea. You never even talk about being Indian.” Without pausing, I replied, “It’s because for so long I had to hide being Indian!” That conversation stuck with me for months. By the end of 2020, God had placed a deep burden in my heart for Indian women. 

I moved from Kerala to Texas at the age of seven. I left all that was familiar and stepped into a place where I was the other. I remember walking into my third grade classroom where no one looked like me. I watched groups of kids play together at recess while I sat alone under the shade of a tree. I knew that I had to fit in to survive in this new place.

I slowly learned how to eat with a fork and knife instead of my hands. I watched episodes of Sesame Street to learn how to speak English with an American accent. Within two years, I had assimilated to the dominant culture and was like everyone else. The superpower of an immigrant is the ability to quickly adapt to the environment in which we are placed. Therefore, I became an expert chameleon, even in ministry. 

Most of the spaces I was invited into didn’t offer much diversity. Even places with Asian representation rarely included Indians. As a Christian, I know my identity is rooted in Christ, that I am first and foremost a child of God, and that my allegiance is to Him. But I didn’t even recognize that I hid my culture and ethnicity in the process whenever I stood to share God’s word or wrote for Christian publications. Slowly I forgot that I was uniquely created as an Indian-American woman.

But does culture even matter to God?

Joseph was misunderstood and hated by his own brothers. He found more favor in the eyes of foreigners than his own family, and therefore, tried to fit in. But when the time came for him to help his people, he revealed his true identity. Esther was an orphan whose beauty gave her opportunities that she could never have imagined. She was given a position of influence and power but no one knew she was Jewish. But when faced with a burden to save her people, she declared who she was at the risk of losing everything. Even our God became flesh, walked this earth as a man, and lived in the context of Jewish culture.

But in addition to these biblical examples, I was convicted when I realized that hiding how God made us can suggest that he made a mistake. We conceal and cover up blemishes, and things that bring us shame. But God didn’t accidentally make me Indian. In His sovereign power and wisdom he made me with brown skin, dark brown eyes, and black hair. He chose for me to be born within a specific timeframe and in the beautiful southern coast of India. It was all on purpose. It is a part of my story. It forms my voice as I share His word with others. And in order to come out of hiding, he had to heal me from the lie that I was made to merely fit in. 

In 2020, God gave me a burden for Indian women and removed the burden of having to hide my cultural identity. The Holy Spirit pulled me out of what I found comfortable and led me into what I was called to do. This was his way of positioning me to help others. He deeply pressed upon my heart that people need to see Jesus in someone that looks like them. 

If I wanted to reach Indian women and help them know Jesus, I had to tell them about my lived experience as an Indian woman and how Jesus changed me. My cultural identity wasn’t an obstacle to my purpose, but was the platform God used to reach others.

I wish someone told that little Indian girl in third grade that we were never made to fit in. Every part of our story is unique and covered with the fingerprints of God. Nothing is accidental. We don’t need to hide. And when we truly believe that and trust God enough to show up as our whole Indian selves, we will bring God glory.

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Simi John is a speaker and the author of I Am Not. She and her husband, Jayson, pastor a church in Norman OK. Simi is a full-time physical therapist and mom of two children and has written for (in)courage, Thrive Today!, Everyday Faith by Dayspring, and MOPS magazine. From podcasts to large events, Simi regularly teaches on topics of identity and leadership in Scripture. You can catch her teachings on Rightnow Media, or follow her on Instagram.